1. |
Dispel
03:25
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i wanna get optimistic about things and i’m
bordering on incoherent i can’t seem to
forget the mistakes i've made on the way
make sure i don’t
make sure they’re etched into me
i’m feeling
out of it gotta get over this cycle
gotta quit if possibly
universalizing the personal again, are we?
down and around is there anything profound i’ve ever said
there’s a feeling surrounds every crowd i’ve ever been
how do you sound when you’re breaking your silence
an incantation of what your heart is beating
letting out little shouts showing your wings
there’s a tale to be told and your part is the key
send it all out and listen to receive
that if you lend some of your mind
i’ve
got
gotta get things off mine
because i lost so much
so much of myself
thinking that i could be
could be someone else
as if there’s honesty
that i shouldn’t tell
and if i hold my breath
might change how i felt
all the revisions i’m rehearsing in my head
editing’s bothersome, enter hit send.
an irrational extension of this
present tense
and in the effervescent glow that you bask
an electroencephalograph
in amazement now reach out a new grasp
off your path
cause if we open up inside
try
might
let eachother live our lives
yeah cause i kept so much
so much of myself
and cause it’s all still me
can’t be someone else
cause living honestly
guess i might as well
with this heart on my sleeve
never should dispel
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2. |
In Stitches
05:02
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in stitches
how i find myself
like fishes
that have been filleted
it’s just been a few hours or days
how i’ve aged
you did this
asked for this
begged for this
needed this
it was you
wasn’t it
there’s no one else
to blame
for
these stitches
signed across the line
my wish it’s
true that this was mine
i’m told in a few months sometime
i’ll feel fine
when missing the pulse and warmth of flesh
raw nerves can feel on edge
smoldering wreck smoldering wreck
adrift of all the senses
in stitches
tied down to the bone
shattered all i’ve known
could i be wrong
have i been wrong
doesn’t matter
cause what’s done is done i’m done
will you have permanent
confusion ‘bout it?
think you’d do it again?
from time to time.
it’s just been a few years decades
the other side
of hell can be bliss
love myself
love myself like this
i’ll live with this
live without this
if only i could do things over
and over and over again
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3. |
Rewired
04:07
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i’m used to being
rewired
different as in how?
down to the letter.
in heaven or in hell?
that doesn’t matter.
my synthetic life
ain’t so bad once you try it
dancing on a knife
be prepared to survive it
engineered just like
you’re a patent appliance
living off your path
in defiance
no changing minds
except yours and mine
let’s redefine
remake us in time
no stopping science
rewrite reality
rewiring what
we can be
i’m intertwined
external memory now
this is fine
there’s no difference ‘tween it and me now
i’m rewired with microcircuitry now
throughout
hi
your generation’s gonna die
we couldn’t stop it now in time
replacing cell by cell your mind
you’ll feel much better now
hey
regeneration’s gone away
your telomeres are now decayed
the best we’ll do is integrate
you’ll get rewired now
circuitboard of damocles fused to my head
make it my home as it comes for the rest
i do
i do
adieu
i used to be like you
just
just a little bit
just maybe
forgot that point of view
just
rewired
too rewired
i am
just another human
nothing
more or less than human
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4. |
I'm Not Real
04:41
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pain is a message sending
information that I don’t
need to
want to
feel anymore and
tingle of pleasure is an
orchestration of my mind
that I
disguise as life i
and i'm impossible
i know this well
so i'll disguise myself
as myself and and and and and and
urge to delete words i've said
the things you've read
a better me should have been here instead
there i go again
so full of regret
that's how i've been
disguising myself as naked
disguised as me
disgust in myself for faking
and i'm pretending i’m gonna make it
like on tv
pretending it's a prologue for
reality again
i
don’t know what you’re
don’t know what you are
but
I’m not real I’m not real
I’m not real I’m not real
I can’t touch I can’t feel
I can’t touch I can’t feel
I’m not real I’m not real
who do you want to be
and stop being
if it were up to me
i’d exist please
and there’s no telling when
the dreams begin
finding that when i’m in
that’s where i live
urge to delete words i've said
the things you've read
a better me should have been here instead
there i go again
so full of regret
over nothing
disguising myself as naked
disguised as me
disgust in myself for faking
and i'm pretending i’m gonna make it
like on tv
pretending to be
me
and i
do not stand by
can not back away
do not stand by
wavered halfway
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5. |
An Obvious Villain
04:31
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if i just
could exist
how i wish
i insist
so you were out to put
the fear of god into me
just what i needed
more rude authority figures
to disappoint
self appointed messengers
enactors of wrath
you've a vanity more twisted
than i’ve ever had
i don't want
don't need
your heaven
you can spend your whole life
hating things you can change
if you think that will do any good
you can follow their path
do each thing that they say
just don't act like everyone else should
please don't hate us
for our freedoms
and bravery
please don't hate us
for our freedoms
and bravery
we will love who we want
become what we want
and you can not stop
believe it or not
we will love who we want
become who we want
and you can't stop
us all
remember
your future
though unsure
is still yours
one life to
be who you want to
will you choose
to seize the chance
in front of you
and if they
refuse this
won't excuse this
if they
reject this
such pettiness
no one can
no one can
replace this
it's yours
it's your chance to live
life till what
ever end
embrace it
you’re coming with us
into tomorrow yes
if we just
turn
into dust
even if it just hurts
till the heat death of this universe
stay with you
i want
i need to
let me stay here with you
i
i want to
stay and share
it with you
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6. |
Layer
03:50
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applying thin layer
of my daily masquerade
cause i’m still too frightened
of the permanent variety
hey do you remember
we were going to change our way
but the world wouldn’t wait
and if you should peel this skin back forgive please
i’m just a little guy piloting a bigger me
the worst fears that we had came true
‘cept the one ‘bout you
did you decide
it’s time
arrive
tell what you find
all of our lives
on the line
defy
define
there’s always newer models
you won’t stay state of the art
tattooed on your sleeves are the sponsors
who keep support
of your parts
it’s corporate
as i try to savor
every moment every day
waiting for the other
shoe to drop upon me
cause i'm walking wounded
there’s no plot armor to see
not the protag of reality
i’m just a little guy piloting a bigger me
not the protagonist of reality
did you discard
the start
so far
you're torn apart
now just a shard
left in scars
embers
and sparks
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7. |
For All We Know
04:38
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in this world is
all we’ve known of life
all in one corner, all alone
and i ask what have i
made of my time have i
helped extend our reach up above
our reach up above
you
say that hope is lost
that at the cost of us
there won’t be time it’s far too late
we’ve plundered all and sealed our fate
but i’ve faith
in this one and only thing
that
when i look into the sky
i know we will survive
i know we will in time
i know we will
and when i look into your eyes
i know we will survive
and
wishing on this
sailing off with
the fruits of life and of knowledge
we will move on to the stars
with what we can
our cause to make sure earth’s not alone
the heavens our home
this
life i took for granted
what i’m searching for
a way to send a seed along
disperse a forest through a galaxy’s depths
till my smiling dying breath
that
when we look into the stars
we know each world is ours
for all we know
each ours
live like it so
that when we go into the stars
we still return to ours
everything anything something and nothing
you are
everything anything something and nothing
give me
everything anything something and nothing
we are
everything anything something and nothing
everything
anything
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8. |
Problematic
04:46
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i’m problematic
i tow the line
but not in all
the right ways
got a posting
history
mutuals with
the enemy
gatekeeping
things away it seems
stay in my lane, haha
keep telling me
unideal
inconvenient
how’d you describe it
that i’m problematic
oh. that i’m problematic
oh. yeah i’m problematic and you’re defending culture
oh.
oh yeah you’ve shown me how
i’m in the wrong i’m in the wrong
i’ll do much better now
i’ll go along let’s get along
it was an honor
servicing
your purity
policing
who is that you’re
following
maybe you’ve been
keyword searching
on the block list
shattered dreams
and did you laugh at
those dank memes
internet handles
evidence
there’s no tomorrows
you’re problematic
oh. yeah you’re problematic
oh. yeah you’re problematic and you’re offending culture
don’t put the foot in mouth again
don’t get in fights you can not win
ostracization from the
polite society
making examples of what we must not be
there's no redemption arcs here
there's no more chances we've
moved on to better things
every word every glance every move
every choice that you make
that you’ve made
are you even trying to be cool about it
don't you hold up to scrutiny
come on come on
what you got to hide
now i got my doubts about you
you face the consequence too
you're so defensive
appalling
the paranoia keeps on keeps on calling
come on offend me
come on pretend we
we got so much to bicker about
i’m problematic?
unpossible!
when i’ve done all
the right things
social iso-
isolation bubbles
echo chambers
they’re responsible
such a boomer
what gave that away
it’s curry favor with
the oppressor day
no it’s the children
who are wrong
got outta touch
i’m problematic
oh.
how did you put it
that i'm problematic
can you not see that i am problematic
political football
come on it’s good all
all of our hot takes and opinions
purity patrolling me
get into my head find the flaws
self satisfaction that we still feel
oh how being right matters
more than results
thanks i hate it
thanks
i hate it
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9. |
Kind of Person
03:20
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trying
to do the best i can
crying
is this the best i am
do i
do what i
do what i
do what i
do what i can?
yeah.
or am i
too scared to learn
and confirm
what i heard
in my head?
oh no.
i’m just not good enough
i’m just not good enough for you
right out of the ordinary
you came like a dream to me
could salvage this life
that was just out of reach
and i didn’t stand
a chance
no
could i please
just advance
to be
the
kind of person that i want to be
the
kind of person that i should have been
i need some
where else to point my finger guns
when i say
hey
please don’t read the replies
just hit like share subscribe and tell me
tell me
i just got good enough
i just got good enough for you
always
someone else to
prove myself to
don’t live up to
there must be
somewhere else to
somewhere else to
somewhere else to point my
finger guns
they’re just not good enough
they’re just not good enough for you
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10. |
I've Got
03:45
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i can’t
concentrate at all
i’ve got
confidence at heart
i’ve got a little bit of problem here
i get an energetic burst that veers
my life out of control
the best of me goes up in smoke
i’ve got my medicine and all I hear
is everyone’s got a little bit of problem here
but somehow i fail to grasp
spin wheels and then i crash
when i go to sleep i want to be exhausted
when i wake up i want to feel alive
when i go to sleep i want to be exhausted
when i wake up i
oh
i’ve got a lotta things i gotta do
to get around to the things that i wanna do
different’s the same ‘tween me and you
grab hold the things you’re ‘bout to lose
i can’t
concentrate at all
and sometimes
deep inside
i feel like
i might as well not have even got up at all
i might as well not have even started it all
i might as well not have even got up at all
i might as well not have even been at all
at all
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11. |
Fading Fast
02:51
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i’ve been fading fast
did you see that
did you see that
in the corner of my eye
world broke free from its disguise
a dark light shines
he looks like an invention
prototype boy
a love life he won’t mention
original joy
down a past that’s hidden
in signals and noise
the pathways were rewritten
can hear in your voice
i’ve been fading fast
can you hear me
can you hear me
plug me in i’m ready
plug me in
can’t you hear me say
i want to live
though so far from perfect
we’ve been
creating
a paradise
haven’t we
i’ve been fading fast
out of the corner of my eye
world broke free from its disguise
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